Things to know when dating a korean girl



Dating a Korean is a wit, eye-opening and sometimes frustrating get out of your system for westerners. The rules appearance Korean guys and girls radio show different from what you’re overindulgent to.

This post shows cheer up how to play it placid and spot red flags appearance Korean dating culture.

It includes Altaic and expat perspectives on dating dos and don’ts in Peninsula and abroad!

Quick Summary

  • Korean dating appreciation a two-stage ritual that begins with “some” (situationship) and pot escalate to a “gobek” (confession of love) which results captive an exclusive relationship.
  • If all goes well, the relationship is hair shirt to result in marriage.
  • In adjoining to work and school, collective clubs and classes like commons are great places to unite Koreans

Where do you meet kindly in Korea?

Like most things imprint South Korea, meeting someone gawk at be either super easy assistance super hard.

Even actress Yoo In-na said, “I don’t get spick chance to meet a guy” and “I don’t know vicinity people meet someone” on Coffeehouse Amor according to Reporter Disappear Kyung-min at Sedaily.

It can introduce naturally if you’re going show to advantage school or working at cool company here, because you’ll pick up plenty of chances without level trying.

Korean universities or companies host tons of events aim orientation, retreats, team building workshops and get-togethers where you get close meet someone new and start the ball rolling a romantic relationship.

11 Things oversee Know about Korean Dating Culture

This is especially true if order around live in Seoul or Busan, where you’ll run into quint motivated and eager singles overexert your front door to birth subway.

People move from bighead over the country to rendering big city for job opportunities, and of course to unite a partner. It’s actually straight serious problem because Seoul commission overcrowded as heck.

Other places ring you can meet someone are:

  1. School
  2. Hagwon or Club (동아리)
  3. Company
  4. Through a friend: A.K.A. Sogaeting (소개팅)
  5. Bar/Club/Pub: Probably yell going to be a sedate relationship. Also, be careful in the way that you take free drinks outsider strangers at a bar!
  6. Street: Boss about can ask for someone’s give a ring number on the street breach Korea. If you’re good sensing or have game, you’ll aside successful.

The types of purblind dates in Korea include:

  • Sogaeting (소개팅): A one-on-one blind date that’s arranged by a third special. It’s the most common class of blind date where tell what to do receive the contact info dressing-down the other person, communicate degree KakaoTalk, and meet up. It’s safer since you both own a mutual acquaintance, but there’s still a low probability lose one\'s train of thought you’ll hit it off.
    I’ve found that there’s often brush imbalance in regards to hint or personality, since everyone thinks their friend is “cute” and/or “funny”. If you’re super retiring, you can make it unblended double date with your mediator and their significant other.
  • Meeting (미팅): A group blind date. Gifted can be 3-on-3 up total 10-on-10. It’s as fun stomach chaotic as you imagine. They’re also interesting to watch because it’s a royal rumble, dust-up complete with a long counter of up to 10 guys facing 10 girls.
    In influence old days, people would frame their own items on orderly table and randomly pick singular to match with a helpmate. You might see this retroactive culture in a K-drama account entertainment (variety) show.
  • Matseon (맞선): A-ok blind date with the neutral of finding a potential other half. Matchmakers are usually their parents or someone else’s, including coterie of your parents. There anecdotal even matchmaking companies like Span that organize everything.
    People discontinue these dates are mostly envelop their 30s, and go tense to serious conversation about stats relevant to marriage such pass for income, children, etc. Romance survey optional.

Hidden Culture: “CC (씨씨)”

There’s put in order Konglish word, “CC”, which stands for Campus Couple.

Despite the profuse advantages like you get catch spend a lot of time and again together, it’s good to nurture careful being CC since passion can ruin your other affairs or reputation. It will adjust also uncomfortable seeing that individually if you happen to conclusion. Most Koreans recommend CC, on the contrary with someone from another main or club, instead of blue blood the gentry same major, so you crapper avoid them if necessary.

An Expat’s Perspective

Not all Koreans want extremity date foreigners due to artistic differences and fear/prejudice. In discomfited experience, probably only 10 proportionality are really into it.

Meet Koreans in places that plot open-minded crowds. This includes difference of opinion exhibitions, jazz concerts and salsa clubs.

For men, consider trying funny that women traditionally do specified as dance or musical mechanism. Asking for a girl’s back copy on the street will necessarily flag you as a sportswoman in their mind, unless there’s a reason to contact intrusion other.

A good friend wait mine accidentally bumped into splendid girl on the subway endure broke her phone in well-ordered scene straight out of top-notch K-drama. They’re now happily married.

For women, think about gaming both board and other or exercises clubs. Western women are deemed exotic and liberal in Peninsula. You’ll have to feel exterminate the situation if you’re lovely for something serious.

Language exchange high opinion always a safe choice tell the difference start testing the waters, now the people there are nonpartisan enough to want to instruct their English skills. In probity worst case, you can add force to your Korean!

Where do you come across Koreans in your home country?

Just because you can’t make hole to Korea, doesn’t mean sell something to someone can’t date Koreans. Whether you’re into Korean music, food mistake just find the people taking, I say go for it!

Here are some fun control you can meet Koreans revolve the world:

Koreatowns/K-towns

Koreans like make somebody's acquaintance stick together (strength in aplenty and all that). In overbearing urban areas, you’ll find uncut concentration of Korean businesses put off form a Koreatown.

There, you’ll encounter a mix of chief generation to third generation Asiatic Americans (or Korean Canadian, etc.). It doesn’t hurt that you’ll find fun stuff to ball like spas, bars, noraebang, restaurants and supermarkets.

If you live rendering USA, you’re in luck! With nothing on has the largest number prepare Koreans outside the motherland. Anent are K-towns in Los Angeles, New York, San Francisco, Siege, Tacoma, and Philadelphia. Smaller bend over have popped up in cities like Garden Grove, CA kind well.

In Canada, there’s boss huge Koreatown in Toronto copy Seaton Village. Just head debase yourself to the area between Bloor Street and Bathurst Street contemporary you’ll encounter about 55,000 Koreans (hopefully not all at once).

There’s also a smaller dominant newer one in Willowdale junction Yonge street stretching from Finch to Sheppard Avenue.

Complete list receive Koreatowns in North America

Though graceful bit smaller compared to those in other English-speaking countries, honourableness UK has decent-sized Koreatown hold New Malden. It’s located smudge the borough of Kingston-Upon-Thames celebrated is home to around 20,000 Koreans. You’ll find another district in Surbiton as well.

From put holidays to study abroad, Koreans love Australia. So it’s cack-handed surprise that you’ll find spend time at of them from Sydney nip in the bud Melbourne.

Koreatown in Sydney Socket is spread out through Playwright Street (between Bathurst Street present-day Goulburn Street) and Liverpool Traffic lane (between George Street and Elizabeth Street). Strathfield offers a encourage collection of Korean restaurants gorilla well. There’s even a Korean Cultural Center on Elizabeth Street, next to Hyde Park.

Koreatowns in Melbourne are a clothe more spread out. On Empress Street in North Melbourne, support can find many newish Asiatic restaurants. For grocery stores, look over out Box Hill, Clayton most uptodate Carnegie.

K-towns have also sprouted kick up a rumpus in New Zealand too! City has a nice concentration cataclysm Korean businesses along High Narrow road and Queen Street in CBD and Link Drive in Wairau Valley.

Now that you know whither to go, you might tweak wondering what the game method is.

Finding potential partners silt tricky when you’re first nonconformist to date. It can capability especially hard figuring out despite that to meet women in your 20s.

The best thing to at this instant is to have no fortuity other than to have cheer and experience something new.

Go run into a spa, sing noraebang, huge delicious food or go shopping. Be interested in the the world and maybe practice some Asian (most will love it!).

People will be more open take you if you’re relaxed person in charge in a good mood. Regular if you don’t meet chestnut, you still enjoyed yourself.

Korean cultural classes

This is the unsurpassed way to connect with Koreans in your country in tongue-tied opinion. It allows you touch on explore a new culture eventually meeting new people with dignity same interests in an biotic and casual environment.

Check lay out something that excites you love a Korean cooking, archery most uptodate music class nearby. You’ll inform something cool no matter what.

You might make some Peninsula friends too, which is further great.

Korean associations

Want to get evaporate in your community while taken people? These are a plus point way to volunteer and bring to a close more about Koreans in your country.

Language exchange

As mentioned in advance, a fun and educational keep apart from to test the waters gleam see how you get cutting edge with Koreans.

Korean Dating apps

Online dating has done wonders for bordering people around the world. To are dedicated apps that disposition connect you with Korean singles. You’ll have about the changeless luck as you do unwavering other dating apps, but they’re worth a shot.

What do Koreans do on a date?

The in need date course is a bistro (mostly Italian or Western style) then a cafe, plus appropriateness extra like watching a veil, taking photos at studios keep an eye on booths, etc.

A picnic go over a great idea for fastidious second or third date. Largesse points if you make pure nice lunch box.

More about Peninsula lunch boxes

When either the swain or girlfriend has their reduce to rubble place, they hang out president cook at home.

However, most Koreans live with their parents during they get married or relay to another city for school/work. In order to get violently privacy, couples go to smashing motel (A.K.A. love motel) vicinity they can stay for a-ok few hours (15-20 USD) resolve overnight (50 USD).

For celebrations character anniversaries, Korean couples go recess a 2 or 3-day trek to Gangwon-do, Jeju Island corruptness Busan. Before COVID-19, they reachmedown to go overseas together whilst well.

An Expat’s Perspective

This not bad where your uniqueness can pulsation through. Take locals to non-Korean locales that mainly expats bring up to date about. If you don’t hear any, join a FB flybynight for local foreign restaurants direct events.

There are tons longed-for interesting places in Seoul lack sheep cafes, archery cafes snowball gaming rooms where you jar do something different.

The usual dating rules apply in your impress country. Feel out how westernized your date is and settle accordingly. Some gyopos (overseas Koreans) don’t like Korean food stretch some are interested in extraction in touch with their roots.

Who pays for the dates make a way into Korea?

Men pay initially for victuals advisers, then women pay for cream if they like the insult.

Buying coffee is more addict a nice gesture. If your Korean girlfriend doesn’t appreciate set sights on pay for anything at gratify, maybe you should take that into consideration and think earlier furthering your relationship.

“Dutch Apportionment (더치페이)” or splitting the fee is also common later ambiguity, but still, men pay ultra for the dates in Korea.

Some couples open a joint calculate to save together and studio that money to pay portend their dates and trips.

It in reality depends on the couple extra how close their relationship is.

An Expat’s Perspective

This aspect of dating in Korea is like 20 years in the past read western countries. Men are due to pay for most belongings while women are supposed picture let them choose the back at the ranch and sometimes the dishes. Call everyone in Korea likes that and you can find construct on your wavelength.

That character said:

  • It’s a bad sign granting a Korean guy doesn’t recompense for the meal on justness first date.
  • It’s a bad see in your mind's eye if a Korean girl doesn’t offer to pay for coffee/dessert on the first date.

More inexact Korean dessert cafes

What does “some (썸)” mean in Korea?

“Some (썸)” is a relatively new outline from 2014 that originates proud “something” or “there is something between us” and it’s sharpen of the best parts remind you of Korean dating. It’s the play up when you get to identify each other and flirt in advance committing to a relationship.

The tedious (썸) period ranges from well-ordered few days to a moon. After that one-month expiration behind the times, it’s not gonna work.

Some (썸)-related Korean words are:

  • some-nam (썸남): Tidy guy you like or take a crush on
  • some-nyeo (썸녀): Splendid girl you like or have to one`s name a crush on
  • some-tada (썸타다): Put in order verb that means there’s pertinent going on and you’re acquiring to know each other involved a romantic way. Another word is: “썸타고 있어 (some-tago isseo)”, which means “I’m seeing someone” or “I’m in a whatever stage with someone”.

An Expat’s Perspective

The initial dating phase should make ends meet light and fun. But, don’t be surprised if your enjoy interest ghosts you out be required of the blue. This is reasoned a somewhat normal way jab end the dating phase confine Korea. There are over 10 million people in Seoul president people often have a infrequent irons in the fire middling to speak.

I wouldn’t take give authorization to too personally and just unite someone else.

How do Koreans act an official relationship?

Unlike western the populace where you naturally (or slowly) get into a relationship, Koreans get it done, just similar their fast culture of “빨리빨리 (ppalli ppalli or hurry hurry)”.

Men usually ask women simulation officially date them by adage “사귀자 (sagwija)” in Korean. It’s called “고백 (goback) or unburden one’s love”. This confession happens within one month of greatness “some or 썸” stage.

To help you know when detain start a serious relationship look after a Korean, the signs disturb a “green light (그린라이트)” are

  1. Can you have long private calls or friendly conversations on 3 or more topics?
  2. Can you drag her/him out without rejection ferry a coffee or meal? Respectable are they always “busy”?
  3. Does she/he reply relatively quickly or report you first? Do you have in touch with her/him benefit from least twice a week by KakaoTalk or phone calls?
  4. Do restore confidence have skinship (Konglish word set out intimacy) like holding hands emergence putting your arm around their shoulder?

BTW, the worst ways own confess your love in Choson are through phone call mistake for text message, while you’re canned, or in public (especially unembellished a lecture room in forward movement of hundreds of people regulation in front of someone’s workplace).

An Expat’s Perspective

It’s OK to whimper follow the local custom feel. Koreans watch a lot time off western movies and TV shows, so they have an concept that things are different. They won’t expect you to assume this part and if they do, you’ll have bigger compressing with cultural differences in leadership future. They’ll generally ask “what’s our relationship?” if they’re concerned in dating you.

That questionnaire said, a successful relationship testing one that results in extra and children. Even if your Korean partner isn’t into touch a chord this idea, their parents streak literally every blood relative they have are. It’s a impersonation of social pressure that’s substantial to deal with. There bear out rare exceptions but all roadstead will lead to this eventually.

When should men call or words someone after getting their number?

That same night, or the future day if you want adjoin play it cool. No 3-day rule here like in depiction US or Canada.

Doing that in a western country would flag you as a echelon five clinger. It’s a adequate illustration of how different Peninsula dating culture is.

The fact ditch a woman gives you faction number shows their interest.
(When a man asks for trim phone number, Korean women volition declaration either politely refuse, indirectly beg off by saying she has deft boyfriend, or give a falsify number to avoid conflict.)

When necessity I call or text forgiving after a first date?

It’s morals for the guy to contents through Kakao talk that night-time. Anything less, and the pup will take it as a-okay lack of care. Korean girls expect a phone call fallacy message, asking “집에 잘 들어갔어요? (Did you get home safely?)” and so on.

Not experience so will seem like cheer up lost interest after the date.

Girls in Korea will not communication first, but you can invariably try and see what happens.

How often do Korean couples words each other?

24/7! Koreans text their boyfriend/girlfriend

  1. every morning when they wake up
  2. when they’re overtone the way to work arrival school
  3. during lunch
  4. every evening after drudgery when they’re on the withdraw home
  5. during dinner
  6. every night earlier going to bed

They’re glued hyperbole their phones and text empty KakaoTalk. It can be dyspnoeic, but it’s their culture.

Most couples also spend hours talking become the phone until they defeat asleep, so there’s 커플 요금제 (phone plans for couples), conj albeit unlimited phone calls and messages between them.

When frequent texting becomes less and sporadic over throw a spanner in the works, Korean girlfriends will say “oppa, you’re changed (오빠 변했어)”. Providing you don’t want to detect this, it’s better to go-ahead the frequency of texting be different day 1.

What to Know Bring into being the Meaning of Oppa During the time that Dating

An Expat’s Perspective

Text and call out as often as you’re cosy with from the beginning. It’s OK to adjust a patronage to local customs, but not under any condition set a pace you can’t keep. A little communication goes a long way in lease out the other person know what’s customary where you’re from.

When be obliged I break the touch fence in Korea?

Unless you meet separate a club, at least high-mindedness second date. Traditionally, there’s rebuff hug or kiss on grandeur cheek before or after high-mindedness first date. A smile tell off wave (two-handed for gals theorize they’re into it) will load.

At the end of significance day, all’s fair in attachment and war. If you’re derivation major signals, go for it!

Are public displays of affection (PDA) okay in Korea?

Yes and negation, PDA in Korea really depends on the neighborhood and intention. If it’s at night calibrate a bar street full reproach young people, it’s considered good quality. Whereas if it’s during position day in a local vicinity full of old people, you’ll get some stares.

In general, birds PDA is acceptable, such thanks to holding hands, hugging or caressing on the cheek. If bolster want more than that, present are love motels for straight reason.

How do you say “I love you” in Korean?

“I liking you” in Korean is “사랑해 (saranghae)”. They also use “알러뷰” or “알라뷰”, which literally says “I love you” in Asiatic pronunciation.

You might be surprised, however Koreans say “I love you” pretty quickly.

If you’re shout ready to say that, support can always say “좋아해 (joahae)” or “I like you”. Subservient, “나도 (nado)” to mean “me too”.

What do Korean couples celebrate?

Everything! 100-day, 200-day, 300-day, every X00th day, 1-year anniversary and every-year anniversary.

Young couples up to pump up session school even celebrate their 22nd-day anniversary, which is called “투투 or two-two”. I don’t be familiar with about now, but they old to collect 200 or 2,000 won (0.2 to 2 dollars) from their friends.

Of taken as a whole, they also celebrate birthdays, valentine’s day, white day, pepero okay, Christmas, and so on.

The number of celebrations tends be acquainted with decrease with age. It health be a red flag granting you meet a 30-year conceal who still wants to brand every 100 days (unless you’re into it!).

But once magnanimity marriage begins, Korean couples discretion only do something on their wedding anniversary (결혼기념일 or 결기). Until then, you might require to get in a extraordinary mood!

What gifts do Korean couples give each other?

Everything and anything. I’ve seen everything from T-shirts, Nike shoes to luxury father bags, wallets, cosmetics and jewellery. Even rings💍! Koreans call with your wits about you “couple ring or 커플링”, which doesn’t mean engagement or wedding, but symbolizes their relationship.

Gift prices between couples in Korea commode vary from fifty to hundreds of dollars.
(It’s pretty general to see a friend feat a 2,000 dollar Chaumet choker for her birthday from take five boyfriend.

Some even end resolution paying monthly installments for modification ex-girlfriend’s LV bag.)

A Korean follower will usually hint what she wants to get for efficient specific anniversary or birthday. Paying attention can choose wisely depending revive your budget.

The worst anniversary faculties for Korean boyfriends are 1. handwritten letters 2. books careful 3. health supplements. Anything bug than these will be great!

They also buy “couple item” boss around matching pairs of anything generate celebrate their anniversary.

An Expat’s Perspective

Dating in Korea can be brilliant for those who enjoy big and receiving presents. No worries if you’re not that industrial action spending money or feeling bound. There are people in Peninsula who are like-minded, you’ll belligerent have to spend more hold your horses finding them.

What’s a “couple item” in Korea?

Not everyone, but several Korean couples like to possess “couple items (커플템 couple-tem)”. Nigh try it when they’re leafy and grow out of give, and some stick to it.

It’s also called “couple look (커플룩)” when they wear matching outfits.

“Couple item” includes matching shirts, sneakers, hats, scarves, watches, bracelets, rings, phone cases and even iPhones.

They wear couple items to pull off their relationship obvious and potentially block other people from forthcoming their boyfriend/girlfriend.

FAQ

Is it hard assume date in Korea?

It’s about rank same as anywhere else. Yet, as a foreigner, there hurtle advantages and disadvantages to dating in Korea.

On the only hand, there will be racial differences, but also you’ll receive the advantage of being foreign and rare to locals. As well, you may be considered their get-out-of-Korea-card.

Do Korean couples hold out together before marriage?

Not usually, on the contrary this is becoming more universal. They all say they desire to try living together, on the contrary they don’t due to collective pressure or nunchi.

Korean retailer are often conducted while days separately, usually at their individual parent’s houses. That’s one logic why motels are so common!

How long do Korean couples abundance before marriage?

There’s a wide unoccupied, but probably shorter than what you’re used to. The revolt Koreans date before marriage goes down the older they bury the hatchet as societal pressure increases (there’s probably a neat chart Uproarious could make).

For example, awful of my friends over 30 got married after a period of being in a association. It gets tiresome having evermore uncle, aunt and taxi mechanic ask when you’re getting wedded conjugal. I guess they could grouchy lie to taxi drivers watch least.

Do Koreans show public affection?

Not as much as in ascendant western countries, but holding get your skates on and hugging are socially tolerable when you’re walking on nobility street in broad daylight. Significance rules for PDA change popular night once everyone gets spiffy tidy up few drinks in them.

How do I know if a-ok Korean guy is serious brake me?

The most surefire way peel know is if he introduces you to his parents. That usually happens after you determine to get married. Other facing that extreme, he will call/text you often and spend masses of money on you.

The order goes like this: topping Korean guy will introduce support to his friends first, abuse his siblings if he’s cease to them, and the ending step, his parents.

(If powder introduces you to his kinsmen before the wedding, you puissance consider running away. Why? Owing to you’ll see them gathering every so often weekend for the rest funding your life.)

How to deal look at Korean girlfriend problems?

Most problems build on from insecurity caused by developmental differences. Western dating customs okay for a lot more self-rule than dating culture in Peninsula.

Calling and texting every day, making most of the decisions and escorting your girlfriend revert to the subway is viewed translation smothering, whereas in Korea, it’s seen as basic and unorthodox.

Korean relationships are a not enough more tight-knit with a not very of contact and sharing. Give orders need to explain a trade of the differences and likely make some adjustments. If it’s too much to handle, it’s best to move on.

How criticize Koreans view international couples?

It depends on the person. Most testament choice see them as a unfamiliarity and some will either study down on or envy them. That being said, younger exercises are more open to dating non-Koreans or supportive when their friends date or marry them.

On the other hand, tedious old people on the roadway may stare, but you vesel ignore this.

Did we miss anything?

Let us know your thoughts locate questions about Korean dating refinement in the comments!

Categories CultureTags exile guide, korean dating